Consistency…. kind of…
How consistent are you? Very consistent? Kind of consistent? Almost always consistent?
There really are only two choices; consistent or inconsistent! There is no middle ground. If I’m not consistent 100% of the time, then I’m inconsistent. And students will read us like a book, won’t they? They know who is consistent, and who will “crack” if they keep at it; who they can wear down.
Translate this to parenting and we see the same results. Kids know if we’re consistent or inconsistent.
Which is easier? Maybe counter-intuitive, but it’s easier to be consistent. Being inconsistent is exhausting; saying no, then having a child or student test, test, test, until we finally break. Exhausting. And imagine if I held out, said “no” 20 times, but then finally gave in and said “yes.” That only makes my problems worse; I’ve just taught my child or student to keep at it, keep whining, keep testing, because I just might crack.
But, if “no” always means “no,” our role becomes so much less stressful. Gone are the reasons to test and whine. Consider this idea of consistency, and ask yourself, “How consistent am I?”
Next blog post: practicing consistency.